Things that can help us heal
Let yourself grieve: express your feelings of losing a loved one to a trusted family member, friend or health professional, rather than bottling them up.
Take care of yourself: By eating healthily, exercising, and sleeping. Give yourself time out from the pain – do things you enjoy, even if you don’t really feel like doing them. Try getting back into your normal routine. Avoid alcohol and drugs, as they numb feelings and make it harder to heal.
Take your time and postpone major life decisions: It takes time to get back into life. There isn’t a set time limit on grief, so try not to put pressure on yourself or others to “move on” or “get over it”. Avoid making any big decisions until you can think more clearly.
Say goodbye and share your feelings: Each person has a different way of remembering the person or thing that has been lost. For some people having belongings that remind them of the deceased can help. For others, putting these things away until they are better equipped to face them is easier.
Let people help: Explain to family and friends how you feel and what you would like them to do to help. Often others want to help but they do not know what you need or want; e.g. whether to talk about the loved person or not. Tell them. It can help to talk to a professional, or to talk to someone who has been through a similar experience of losing a loved one, and understand what you are going through.
Let yourself heal: Healing does not just mean “letting go” or “saying goodbye”. You may feel guilty about “forgetting” a person or thing and not want to move on. This is a normal part of healing. Don’t feel guilty about moving through your grief and trying to get back to your life.
Know that you can get through this: You can survive a big loss even if you feel like you can’t. Take one step at a time. Know your limits and expect some set-backs. It may be the hardest thing you’ll ever face but you can heal.
Be prepared for stressful or sad events: events and situations that remind you of your loss can be particularly hard to deal with. Prepare for these events and your reactions to them, and it may not be as hard as you think it will be.
Do things just for you: taking “time out” to do the things that you used to enjoy or to have fun is important. Even when you’re feeling down, try to connect regularly with family and friends and get involved in activities or hobbies.
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